Genshin Impact: My roommate and I became funny Hilichurls

Page 102

"It's all sorted out. We shouldn't have to worry about anything now."

The band leader looked at Zhang Chu, then at the carelessly discarded golf club, and finally up at the sky where Tom and Jerry had disappeared. His lips trembled for a long time, and in the end, all his unspoken words boiled down to a single sentence filled with immense relief and a touch of bewildered gratitude:

"Thank you... thank you, Your Excellency Zhang Chu..."

(The sentiments of all Mondstadt citizens: Finally... they're gone!!! May the wind god protect them, so they don't fall back!!!)

In the distant depths of the starry sky, in some unknown corner, a blue-brown "shooting star" is resolutely plummeting towards a new world whose style also seems somewhat unstable...

Perhaps, a new, chaotic adventure is about to unfold there.

But at least, Mondstadt has finally ushered in true and hard-won peace.

Chapter 121 Erkang: "When in doubt, beat the author!"

"Quick! Let's get out of here! We can't stay in Mondstadt for even a day longer!"

Qingyu, Erkang, Zhang Chu, and Gu Qian, like four frightened rabbits (this metaphor is not intended to provoke Bugs Bunny), scrambled to cling to the shoulders and back armor of the twenty-meter-tall mecha-like Wolf King in extremely ungraceful postures, as if they would be overtaken by something terrifying if they were a second too slow.

Ying and Paimon quickly crawled into the cockpit located on the Wolf King's chest. Paimon even thoughtfully locked the hatch from the inside—mainly to prevent the four guys from squeezing in.

"Wolf King! Start! Take off! Quickly!"

Qingyu patted the Wolf King's cold armor, his voice filled with obvious panic.

The wolf king's electronic eyes flickered calmly, and the thrusters on its back emitted a deep hum before spewing out a stream of scorching particles.

The massive, silver-white mech steadily ascended into the air, gradually leaving the chaotic city of Mondstadt beneath its feet.

"Masters, what is our destination?"

The wolf king's steady mechanical voice rang out, as if its previous panicked escape had nothing to do with it.

"Go to Inazuma!"

Zhang Chu adjusted his slightly crooked mask, his tone resolute.

"That's far enough! It's across the sea! Once this 'evil wind' in Mondstadt has passed, we'll go explore Liyue Harbor!"

"What on earth have you done?!"

Inside the cockpit, Ying finally couldn't hold back any longer and let out a devastating roar through the communicator.

"Why has there been this persistent low pressure hanging over Mondstadt these past few days?! Everyone's looking at us like we're plague carriers! Even old man Marvin, the vegetable vendor, won't sell us carrots anymore! Even Diona at the Cattail Tavern just put up a 'Sold Out Today' sign when she saw us! Tell me! Did you dig up some noble's ancestral grave before you left?!"

"I'm innocent, Ying!"

Qingyu hugged one of the wolf king's antennas and cried out in grievance.

"This time it's really not our fault! How could we have predicted that someone of Bugs Bunny's caliber would cross worlds to visit? What's even more outrageous is that Tom and Jerry's living dads came too! Who could possibly handle this!"

Erkang, clinging to the wolf king's shoulder armor, shouted into the wind, "Exactly! Those guys are practically rule-breakers in the world of comedic characters! Our pathetic comedic skills are as laughable as a slime in a newbie village trying to take on a Stormterror! We can't beat them! We simply can't!"

Ying was speechless.

Thinking about it carefully, it does seem to make sense.

Even these four guys who could infuriate the enforcers of justice fled at the mere mention of their name, so what terrifying existence must be coming from?

She silently withdrew her foot, which was about to kick the control panel.

Paimon flew in the cockpit, his little head filled with big question marks: "But... how did they get here? Is the border of Teyvat full of holes like the walls of the Temple of the Thousand Winds?"

Zhang Chu sighed and explained, "I don't know the specific mechanism. It could be some kind of accident in a higher dimension, or it could be... well, it's not important. What's important is that, in the short term, we, and Mondstadt, shouldn't have to worry about them coming back."

"Why are you so sure?"

Paimon pressed for an answer out of curiosity.

"Because we beat up that lousy writer who wrote such a terrible script!"

Erkang immediately answered, his tone filled with the pride of "eliminating harm for the people," and he even waved his fist, almost slipping off the wolf king.

fluorescent:"……"

Paimon: "..."

What does your attacking the author have to do with the stability of our Teyvat art style?! And why were you even able to attack the author?!

Gu Qian's honest voice came from below, tinged with worry: "I hope everyone is alright..."

Ignoring the ornaments on its body and the noise in the cockpit, the Wolf King maintained a steady speed, pierced through the clouds, and flew towards the distant Inazuma.

Below lies an endless expanse of azure sea, with occasional glimpses of archipelagos and enormous, swimming sea creatures (which the wolf king avoided beforehand).

After a period of flight, the outline of an archipelago shrouded in purple thunderclouds gradually emerged on the distant horizon.

The oppressive atmosphere could be felt even from a distance; it was the atmosphere of Inazuma, a country that had closed itself off from the world.

"Approaching Inazuma airspace, a high-intensity thunderstorm area and an unknown energy barrier have been detected."

The Wolf King's notification sound rang out.

"Just drive straight through! A mere thunderstorm can't possibly kill us!"

Er Kang shouted with boundless pride.

The Wolf King ignored them, and a faint energy shield appeared on the surface of its body. It precisely calculated a relatively safe path, like a nimble silver fish, weaving through the dense lightning and booming thunder. Finally, it broke through the outer thunderstorm without any danger and officially entered Inazuma's airspace.

They chose to land on a remote coastline, a little far from Inazuma Castle and close to Kannazuka.

The wolf king transformed back into his werewolf form, and the group set foot on the land of Inazuma, which was damp and faintly imbued with the aura of lightning.

"Phew... We've finally arrived."

Qingyu let out a long sigh of relief and patted the dust off his clothes.

"Hopefully, Lei Yingying is in a good mood lately and won't give us a 'sudden stab' as a greeting gift as soon as we meet."

"Probably not."

Zhang Chu looked around and analyzed the situation.

"We were, after all, 'heroes' who solved the Eye Hunting Edict and the isolationist problem, and besides, Inazuma's side... doesn't seem to have any particularly outrageous comedic character legends?"

As soon as he finished speaking——

An explosion suddenly rang out from an open space not far away! When the smoke cleared, a man could be seen holding up a device that looked like a rocket launcher and laughing wildly at the sky.

A shell with a cartoon skull painted on it flew crookedly into the sky, and then exploded with a "poof" at a height of several dozen meters, turning into a cloud of black smoke that was not very lethal but very blinding.

Immediately afterwards, a man in a suit, with round eyebrows and blond hair appeared in front of him as if by teleportation, striking a strange pose.

His kick did create some wind pressure that dispersed some of the smoke, but the movement was so exaggerated it looked like he was dancing ballet.

The four-person group, Ying and Paimon, and the Wolf King were all petrified on the spot.

Erkang pointed a trembling finger at the two guys whose appearances were clearly out of place, his voice trembling with tears: "That...that couldn't be...Sanji and Niji from the Vinsmoke family?!"

A chattering voice came from behind Zhang Chu's mask: "The...the One Piece set...why are you here?!"

Qingyu clutched his head in despair: "It's over... I can't stay in Inazuma either... Has Teyvat become a haven for comedic characters?!"

Gu Qian asked, "Is it too late for us to return to Mondstadt now?"

Ying silently turned around and patted the Wolf King's leg: "Wolf King... how about we go straight to Winter Solstice? I heard it's a frozen wasteland there, so no comedian would want to go..."

Paimon, terrified, hid behind Ying, only peeking out with his head, trembling as he said, "They...they don't seem quite right either..."

Inazuma's adventure (or rather, a new round of survival challenges) began amidst this chaotic and desperate atmosphere.

Our protagonists seem destined to never escape encountering these "conceptual" troubles.

"I'm going to beat that damn author up again!!!"

Er Kang roared in fury.

Chapter 122 Justice Descends from Heaven!!

After Er Kang crossed the dimensional barrier for what seemed like the umpteenth time, pressing that poor (or perhaps not so poor) "dog author" onto the keyboard and rubbing him for a full hour.

Those hilarious characters who have invaded the continent of Teyvat like a virus—Bugs Bunny, Tom, Jerry, and even the Vinsmoke family's clowns—

Finally, like an image whose power has been cut off, it flickered a few times, carrying various expressions of resentment and unfinished pranks, before disappearing completely into the air.

The world seemed to become quiet instantly.

"Phew...I'm so exhausted..."

Erkang let out a long sigh of relief and stretched dramatically, as if he had just accomplished a feat of saving the world.

He casually pulled the toilet sieve, which was still stuck in his head and swaying with his movements, and tossed it aside with disdain. The sieve rolled a few times on the grass, leaving a trail of subtle scent.

Gu Qian tilted his huge head, his honest face full of doubt: "Erkang, how long did you... hit the author this time?"

"Exactly one hour, no more, no less!"

Er Kang rubbed his sore arms, and then a flush of anger rose on his face.

"It's all because of that bastard! He actually dared to fight back! He even... he even poked me with this thing!"

He pointed at the filthy toilet sieve on the ground and jumped up and down in anger.

"A scholar can be killed but not humiliated! Does that mean the author can do whatever they want?!"

Qingyu listened with great interest and leaned forward to ask, "That's ruthless! And then? How did you get your revenge?"

Er Kang's face immediately revealed a smile that was a mixture of wickedness, smugness, and utter depravity. He lowered his voice, as if sharing some brilliant plan: "And then? Hehe... I'll give him a taste of his own medicine!"

"I also found a toilet sieve, but... I added some 'special seasoning' to it—"

"A mixture of the sweat of Hilichurl thugs, the essence of slime gel, and a little bit of old mud scraped from between the toes of the ancient ghouls!"

"Taking advantage of his momentary lapse in attention, I stabbed him squarely in the face! The feeling... tsk tsk tsk..."

"hiss!!!"

The onlookers, including Zhang Chu, Qing Yu, Gu Qian, and even Ying and Paimon not far away, all gasped in unison, as if they could feel the "fragrance" and despair that rushed towards them across the dimensional barrier.

"Ruthless! Absolutely ruthless!"

Qingyu covered his nose and backed away, his eyes filled with awe (and a little bit of disdain) as he looked at Erkang.

Zhang Chu adjusted his mask and sighed with a complicated tone, "Aren't you being a bit too harsh on the author? Aren't you afraid he'll hold a grudge and make things difficult for you in later episodes, or arrange something even more outrageous to get back at you?"